Today I suffered a 40 minute (round trip) car drive to an appointment that turned out to be a giant waste of time. Pissy before this, I was filled with rage unequivical to the situation. Needing gas anyway, I decided it was time to try a Sheetz smoothie. You know - smoooooooo-THIE. I LOVE smoothies. I love anything fruity. So I got some gas, went in, ordered a Wildberry Lemonade smoothie with Fat Burner, and inexplicibly, got some white chocolate Reeses and cookies n cream Hershey Bars (at least they cancelled each other out, right?). Mmm. I was about to embark on a white chocolate fruity trip. My favorite. I walked up to the counter to wait. The food maker (what would Sheetz call them? Sharistas?) smiled at me as he made it. I smiled back. He's been my eye candy since college. Sometimes we make love with our eyes.
Or maybe I'm eye-raping him and he's just being friendly. *turns head thoughtfully*
Fruity smoothie. White chocolate. Man candy. Everything perked back up.
I got and paid for my bitchbusters and started walking out the door. I took a sip of my coveted Sheetz Smoothie and my internal monologue yelled, "OHMFGAH! SO not worth it!!"
And then everyone around me was staring at me. Panicking, I mentally reviewed, and realized, yes, that HAD just come out of my mouth.
I smiled brightly (Luckily, Sharisto was not in sight, so his ego was not crushed forever) and walked away quickly, sipping on my smoothie (which, really, wasn't bad, but too watery). The embarrassment mixed with the melted candy (seriously, five minutes down the road and both candy and whipped cream was melted - it's THAT hot here) put me back into my bad mood. And then as I got to the bottom of my smoothie, there was this BLACK POWDER CAKING THE BOTTOM. MY FAT BURNER. DAMN GOODFORNOTHINGBUTEYECANDY SHARISTO!
!!
Did anyone else have a teacher that had you blend a bowl of high in iron cereal and then run a magnet over it to watch the iron flakes come out? I liked that experiment. I was trying to tell Shana about it earlier.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
The Piss In My Fruit And White Chocolate Parade
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4 comments:
It IS kinda scary what flies out of our mouths sometimes, isn't it? I was out with some girlfriends this weekend at a cool bar, talking to some guys when I referred to myself as "mama". We'd been drinking quite a bit so I leaned over to one of my girlfriends and said, "did I just say that out loud?", but by the look on her face I could tell that I had! Crap.
xoxo
tcb
hey!
Show some pics of K. :) How old is she now?
She is almost sixteen months, and I'll be posting some pictures in a bit. We went to the fair and got pictures.
No smoothie will ever compare to mine, sisher.
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